Tales of Toilet Training

Leave it to my 2 year old to turn something like toilet training to display all of his (less than desirable) personality traits.


So Bugs wakes up from his nap with a dry diaper (yay!) so we go downstairs and he is more than excited to sit on the potty. He wants to sit on the big potty, like ya-ya. All this leads me to believe we will have success...i couldn't be more wrong.

After 40 minutes of sitting on the potty, he finally says "I done". He hasn't gone, but whatever. my butt is numb from sitting on the floor in the bathroom for 40 minutes. So I get him down and we proceed to have the most ridiculous standoff. "sticku" he tells me. (we reward him with a sticker on a chart when he successfully uses the potty.) This is how it goes:

Me: No. you didn't go potty.
Bugs: I done. sticku.
Me: No. You only get a sticker if you go potty.

now he gets mad.

Bugs: I WANT A STICKU!
Me: (still calm) No. Let's go to the living room and get a pullup.
Bugs: Sticku, please? (with the cutest pouty face and lip you have ever seen)
Me: No. Let's go get a pullup.

Now he tries to employ all his charm. He scrunches up his face and says in his "monster voice" "STICKUUUU!" I can't even describe to you how cute this is, I almost crack a smile before I tell him "No" again.

Then he pulls out all the stops. The Pièce de résistance. The silent-fake laugh. He closes his eyes, tilts his head back and bounces his shoulders like he's just seen the funniest thing ever, all without making a sound. Then he stops, looks at me and says "Is funny." I can't help it, I crack up. He patiently waits for me to stop laughing, I bend over and pick him up to take him to the living room. He grabs my face with both hands and looks me dead in the eye and says "sticku, now?"

I walk to the living room. Apparently, this 10 sec walk was all he needed to plot his revenge.

I sit cross-legged on the floor with my scheming son in front of me. I hold the pullup so he can step into it, and when it's about at his knees, he takes his revenge. He pees in my lap.

Conversations from the backseat

Moments that make you go "Awwww...."

(Punks sneezes)
Bugs: Bless you ya-ya
Punks: Thanks Bugs
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Moments that make you go "Huh?"

Bugs: Hey Mommy?
Me: What Buddy?
Bugs: Let me tell you something.
Me: What's that?
Bugs: Tacos.

Intro to my crazy world

I'm a mom. A working mom, which if you ask some people in my 'family' makes me sub-par. If you're one of those people, good for you. It makes me a better mom. I'm not exactly what you call patient (a virtue I'm learning as I try to teach my kids), and going to work fills up my patience meter so that I can appreciate my kids when I get home.

I don't care what you do with your kids (as long as you're doing the best you can) and nothing you say will change how I raise mine.
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I have 3 basic people I go to for 'mom' advice, I know who to go to depending on the response I want.

My Mom-She raised 4 kids, by herself for the most part. She is overprotective enough to not tell me to keep my kid who obviously needs stitches home till morning, but rational enough to tell me when I'm being overprotective-paranoid. She's who I go to when I want sane, rational advice.

My sister-She has 4* kids. (1 step, 2 f her own and 1 on the way) She is the crazy-over-protective-i read too much on the Internet and believe all of it-who i call when i want someone to justify my craziness mom. There is always something wrong with her kids. ALWAYS.

My best friend-She has 2 kids of her own. She is a hardworking, stay at home mom, with a very uninvolved husband. I love her. She lets me cry, yell, vent, whatever before I even ask her how she is, and knows I'll do the same for her. I love her husband too, but I SO lucked out in the husband/daddy department, and NO ONE is as involved as he is.
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My kids are hilarious. I don't know where they got their personalities from. Most days I'm laughing too hard at them to discipline them. At least they got their looks from me. I ain't gonna lie...I make friggin cute babies.

My daughter, my "punks", is 3 going on 16. She has inherited my temper and shoe addiction. Just yesterday we went to Old Navy and she told me she needed purple flip flops. when asked why, she simply responded "I don't have that color." Crap. Not bad when we're talking about $3 flip flops in toddler sizes. I'm screwed when she inevitably gets my huge feet, and wants to go to DSW or Famous every day. (We live in hickville, it's as good as it gets)

My son, bugs, is 2 and thinks he can do everything the bigger kids do. Don't most 2 year olds? Problem is he usually does them, has no fear and usually gets hurt. Good thing is he's only 2 and "kids bounce." So told to me by the paramedic that recently responded to my 911 call. Apparently they do...If I'd have fallen the way he did, I'd still be in the hospital in traction.
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All-in-all we're a pretty normal family. I must clarify that by saying we're normal. Our extended family is, for the most part, NOT.